David “Holmer” Holmes shines as a human being. He sparkles when he talks. He is generous. He is a multi-faceted artist: stone mason, woodworker, carver, and songwriter. Now living in Bradford, Holmer generously accepted our invitation to reflect on his Hartford Dismas House experience and share the philosophy he embodies, influenced by 12 years of incarceration. “I got a spanking, and it stuck. I was humbled.”
Holmer, then 65, arrived in May 2021 at Dismas and stayed 90 days. “In those three months, Dismas was everything. I went from being locked up to having a fair amount of freedom. It gave me a sense of security that I had a place to stay, I was safe, and I had meals every day.” While he never did this, he could have gotten up at 2:30 in the morning, throw a pizza in the oven, sit down and eat it, and then have a half gallon of ice cream afterwards and go to bed. “Just the fact that I could if I wanted to, I felt like I was lucky to be there. And I had a plan, I was on a mission."
Just after his arrest, he came to terms. “It was literally an epiphany.” His thoughts reorganized, and he became single-minded. His entire life changed. “I was so angry as a kid. It felt like the world was against me and it just got worse and worse. After going in, I changed. I can’t get into an argument with you over a parking spot. I don’t want to fight anyone back. I’m defenseless now.” Holmer set down his anger and surrendered. While not religious, he self-describes as God-fearing. “It’s like having someone with me all the time. I’ve made good, I’ve done good wherever I’ve gone.”
After Dismas, Holmer was ready for an apartment with the Hartford Community Restorative Justice Center in White River Junction. He found work at Big Fatty’s and proudly believes he was the best dishwasher they have ever had. “I was there every day, never showed up late.” A year in the apartment and he was ready to move on, “I didn’t take more than I needed.”
Next came a house in Bradford that had seen better days, yet Holmer knew he could do something with the property. In lieu of rent, Holmer turned the place around, including landscaping, drainage work, and jacking up the porch. This fall, Holmer made the last payment on a 1/3 of acre that houses his workshop. Completed stone carvings adorn the yard, in-process wood carvings wait for his steady hand, and the dahlia bulbs he planted bloom. Holmer’s golden rule is, “Work makes the man. That’s it.” However, gratitude also firmly has a place in Holmer’s heart, and his principles are unwavering.
“Just because I’m an alcoholic and drug addict (side note, Holmer is 15 years sober), doesn’t mean I’m not a good solid guy. I know a lot more than people think I do.” Despite this common misconception, Holmer has people who have stuck by him. “They love me, and they know me. I’m so blessed to have the support from everybody, from my ex-wife to my close friends to my landlord.” He gives special credit to Jeff Backus, former Hartford Dismas House Director, noting “he was very, very good to me and helped me a lot."
Holmer lost so much when he went inside, “But that’s ok. You know those are things I had to leave behind. If that’s what it took to get me where I am today, I am good with all of it.”
